Chipmunks 2, Etherknitter 0.5

I thought we had 'em licked.  Mr. Chipmunk was translocated to a battalion far afield in a brief skirmish where the Etherknitter could declare a clear victory.  I reset the Havaheart trap with luscious peanut butter, and an embedded almond.   The trap sat, lonely, ignored, for days. 

Then, she ventured out of hiding.  She started as a war bride, and endured seeing her husband carted off to cavort with French floozies for the rest of his days.  She was alone.  He left her a substantial inheritance.  The sunflower seeds would last her until she figured out what her next move would be.  Her next move was a rustling dash back into the clutter and bustle of the garage when the Enemy approached to do garden work.

I heard her chipping noises from what I thought was an old cardboard box containing plastic pots.  I kicked it.  Nothing.  Thinking to give her a chance to escape, I dragged the box out of the garage.  Several minutes were spent sorting out pots to keep and pots to recycle.  I rattled the box.  Nothing.  Silly Enemy.  At least now I knew I would have to reset the trap.

I dragged the box back into the garage.  It was heavy, and I pulled it behind me, postponing yet again the final disposition of many of the pots.

Before I can register the one ANGRY *chip* and where it is coming from, I am attacked.  Rocketing through the air by my shoulder, furry chestnut striped creature in full Mighty Mouse pose, paws stretched up and out, tail streaming behind her, launched in the terror of extremis from the depths of the box, just missing me by inches, and I SCREAM.  She lands in front of me, races back to the wall, and closer to the garage door.  I'm laughing so hard I can barely make the necessary predator noises to shoo her out. 

I'm not sure which of us was happier to see her reach freedom.  Inside, outside, suicide, I don't care.  She's gone.  I'm praying for a chipmunk's short memory.

I'm sure you can understand why there are no pictures of this event.

The LeafLace shawl was moving along swimmingly (summer adverbs only, please) until the end of repeat #6.  It's an oft-told, sad story:  count the stitches of the last right side row; come up with the correct number; purl through the wrong side row; knit to the center stitch of the next right side row with one stitch EXTRA; rip back to where the error appears, and reknit back to the center stitch; still one stitch extra; rip back to the beginning of the row and stick it back on the lace couch until I can face it again.  I'm learning to tink lace reasonably well.  Lots of practice. 

This crani cap was knit quickly for a friend who wants to cover her shaved patch after her brain surgery.

Rowan Calmer, color #492, #7 circs, 16", then #7 dpns for the decreases, three row st st hem for a slight roll, then mistake rib hat pattern courtesy of Knot Again Liesel.

I did not realize how wonderful Rowan Calmer is. 

Comments

[Carole]

I can just picture that whole scene - what a riot!

[Marcia Cooke]

Snort! (That was Diet Coke, just in case you wondered what sprayed all over the screen....)

[Manise]

Guffaw! What a scene and riotous affair! I would have paid serious money to have been a fly on the garage wall. The line " I'm laughing so hard I can barely make the necessary predator noises to shoo her out" did me in. Hehehe. Oh, the cap- very nice!

[Marcy]

I was there! You didn't see me, Etherknitter, but I was, and I _did_ get a photo of the attack. And here it is: http://habetrot.typepad.com/photos/images/flyingchipmunk.jpg

[Suzanne]

OMG, what a funny picture you paint. I am sitting at my computer, giggling away. I would have screamed, too.

Great picture, Marcy! It added just the right visual.

Hee, hee, I will be giggling all night. It will take my mind off the heat anyway.

[Chris]

Oh, to have been there!! I think I heard your shriek, though.

Nicely done hat!

[margene]

Oh, oh, oh...if only to have seen that slapstick happening in person!
While at retreat we had a squirrel try to commit suicide by climbing into a plastic garbage bag. He made quite a scene trying to escape and many spinners were running around screaming trying to save him. Your event sounds all the more hysterical.
Calmer is heavenly yarn. The hat is perfect protection for a shaved head.

[Barbp]

LOL - since I haven't planted anything (indoor home improvements) the chipmunks are brave enough to just sit on the tallest rock and sun himself. The usual bat visit has already occurred this summer. Now for something completely different, a freakin' woodpecker. Dare to be different I always say. MFB has declared war! Hopefully you've won not just the battle, but also the war.

Lovely crani cap.

[Ruth]

I'm rolling on the floor over here ... first, because your story reminded me of the time I was babysitting and opened a kitchen cupboard only to see a MOUSE sitting right there where the mug should have been. I'm not sure which of us screamed louder. And second, because I have a whole battalion of chipmunks in the barn, and now have a mental picture of them all flying through the air like the Blue Angels .....

[Caroline M]

Screamingly funny afterwards but less so at the time. The two simultaneous fight or flight reactions must have been something to see.

I think she'll be back....

[Janine]

That was so funny! It reminded me of the time when I went to the cupboard for something and saw one of the cereal boxes wobbling. I thought I had hit it as I opened the door so you can imagine the scream when I made a grab for it and a mouse shot out the top!
Oh and Calmer - can be as addictive as KSH ( and as expensive) - just sayin :-)

[Kim]

OH my............what a vision....hahahahah!!!!!

[Monica]

Ha!

I knit with Calmer for the first time this week, it sure is nice. Now get out of my head!

[PumpkinMama]

What a great image. We have garage 'munks too, I don't bother with them, as we don't even have a garage door so theres no hope of evicting them. We also have a garage woodchuck, believe it or not.

[Kathy]

Oh, gawd. You may face a claim by the little critter for PTSD. :-) Hat looks terrific.

[Lorette]

This is why we need video cameras set up at key places in our homes. Then again, maybe not.
The hat is lovely. Maybe you should knit the chipmunk something as a peace offering.

[Beth S.]

I'm just glad you weren't bitten!

[Lucia]

My cats are jealous of your chipmunk-scaring prowess. Beautiful hat -- love the color.

[DebbieB]

That's the funniest thing I've read today. I can imagine the whole thing - you're very descriptive! Nice hat. Sorry about the lace. And (dare I say it?) Goodbye, Ms. Chips!

[Cathy]

I don't know when I have laughed so hard. Marcy's photo is icing.

[Teyani]

what a good chuckle you gave me this morning, as you recounted the leap-of-the daredevil-chipmunk. thanks :-) I think I would have been totally freaked if a furry little thing with sharp claws went leaping past me!

Leaf lace shawl and the stitch challenge sounds like something very familiar. best it sits in time out for a while, as you bask in the summer breezes.

[Sylvia]

Tears streaming down my face. Thanks for the laughter!

You do realize she's off gathering up her cousins to come see the Very Interesting Human get excited again?

Want to fly out here and see if you can scare away our Three Musketeers, a trio of husky young racoons that have a fondness for the salmon scraps in my trash bin?

That hat will do more than cover your friend's head; it will bring solace and the constant reassurance of a dear friend. You are a good person.

[bev]

You had me laughing so hard that my dogs though I had lost my mind and both began barking! Don't know who needs the sympathy card, you or the chipmunk. Hilarious!

[Juno]

War bride?

I love you.

Also, when you leave medicine, you should write cozy mysteries.

[Kristine]

Oh, wow, loving the chipmunk story.

And I just cast on for a sweater in the calmer. Oh my goodness I love that yarn.

[Theresa]

Calmer's a great name for a hat for that purpose, too.

[vanessa]

where's a camera when you need one?
like christmas vacation ;-)

[Jennie]

Calmer is *dreamy*. I just spent money I could ill afford on 11 balls of Drift, for a sweater for me. I adore Calmer.

[Spinneret]

Outside, Inside, or Suicide. Gah!
Um … I hate to bring it up but what if she went for reinforcements? It's a big union.