Saving the world from math

Fifteen rows, Part II of the Great Sock Project.  The yarn is a very intellectual yarn.  It is crisp, correct, defined and compliant.  I feel the unity of knitting with stitch definition such as this.  But it does not call out to my soul, as does cashmere, silk, or alpaca.  There is no sensuality in the stitches.  It will simply be a beautiful sock.  Lorna's Laces,  Tahoe colorway.

It will be a very examined and analyzed sock.  Part I of the Great Sock Project is complete.  I have measured every inch of sock knitting.  I now know that it takes me 162.33 yards to knit my average st st sock pattern.  I waved the scrap of paper with my numbers and math at Mr. Etherknitter.

"LOOK!  I am now the boss of my sock knitting!"  She laughed.  She danced.  She capered about the bathroom like a madwoman.

Mr. Etherknitter has gotten used to this reaction to FOs.  His college degree makes it possible for him to understand my numerical glee.  Then he outdid me.

Part II of the Great Sock Caper is to weigh each part of the sock process, crosscheck it with the measured math.  The measurements are heir to all permutations of measurement error possible with yarn.  How stretched does one measure the yarn segment?  What is the tension achieved by the knitter in different knitting sessions? 

I asked him if he cared about the humidity factor.  "What humidity....OH!", as a smile crossed his handsome, intelligent and co-conspiring face.  A difference of opinion arose.  He wants me to measure the weight of the yarn and the weight of the needles at the same time that I take temperature and humidity measurements next to the scale.

"NO."  I stamped my sockless foot.  "Do you remember Sleeping Beauty?  The post where I log in all the humidity measurements will be the knitblogging equivalent of the spindle on which she pricked her finger.  My readers' co-workers, cats, and significant others will find them, faces mashed into the keyboard, asleep for a hundred years, if I do that."

I am taking measurements to amuse him.  I will not inflict this on you.  The Java Applet is just one sock away from taking shape, morphing into existence. 

I was stunned to find that my size 10.5 foot needs only 325 yards of yarn.  I'll include ribbing, cuff, gusset, heel, foot and toe data.  Stay tuned.

Weaving in the ends is now a pleasure.  I am not a person who sews.  Yes, I have the current common cold, but I am not feverishly delusional.  (Yet.)  Lorrie dropped a silver sliver in my lap at knitting one evening several months ago. 

It is the most beautiful Chibi needle, hand-machined, as exquisitely detailed as only a talented metal-working knitter can create.  It matches the silver dpns she made, with the twists.  I love it unreasonably.

The stampede to FOs is going very well.  There will be a flood of blogfodder soon. 

Only the vest stands between me and my goal.  And not for long.  I ran into yarn tangles that a more controlled use of scissors will solve.  Picture knitting one side of the V-neck from the inside of one ball, and the outside of a second, and the other side of the V-neck from the outside of the first ball, and the inside of the second.  Confused?  Me too.  I'll label and chop soon, work one side of the V at a time, pick up a gazillion stitches around neck and armholes, sew two seams, after a three needle bindoff for the shoulders, and be done.

Comments

[Juno]

Honestly, if you want to read me humidity measurements, I will read them and not even fall asleep. I bet you'd make them funny.

I can't wait to see the java applet.

[Carole]

You and the Mr. have way too much free time. Except that I know you don't. So I can only conclude that you are both math geeks.

[margene]

I see the twinkle in your eye and the glint of a demon in Mr. Es as you conspire together over sock measurements. Better you than me. Waiting for the flurry of FOs.

[claudia]

Humidity. Wow. I can't wait to see your application of science to sock knitting.

[Cheryl]

Hahaha!! I can just see you there taking down all these careful measurements! You crack me up.

[Danielle]

Humidity. I totally get it. Intellectual yarn. I get that too. Laughing, dancing, and capering about? Well, I've got a mental image of that, and it makes me grin :)

[Lucia]

I know now why you won't just knit the foolish things, uh, you know, that other way. Because you're having way too much fun, that's why. (I predict that you will, too, inflict it on us. In a strange way I look forward to it.)

Also, what a pretty sock.

[string]

I totally wanna know the results

[Caroline M]

"Weaving in the ends is now a pleasure" and you say that you're not feverishly delusional? I'll have a pint of whatever cold remedy you're on.

[Anne]

Oh thank god for people like you. I almost couldn't read your post because you had the word M*TH in the title. It hurts my head to think that you have a spreadsheet for your socks.

[Kim]

I'm with Anne. Math=Scary

[Kim]

btw.........I read your comment on Woolybun chris's blog and I almost peed my pants laughing....hee...I am STILL chuckling

[Kathy]

I love Mr. E. And I also love that needle!

[Manise]

I love that silver darning needle beyond reason! Lorrie needs to open up an ETSY shop me thinks :-)

[susan]

I can honestly say that although I've been married for 20 years, I've never worked out math problems in the bathroom with my husband. You've got one up on me there. ;)

[Pat]

There IS sensuality in Lorna's Laces for me - somehow it is practical and sensual - my favorite sock yarn!
I'll be watching the #s!

[Teyani]

Snorting and laughing out loud here -- 'cuse me whilst I wipe the coffee off my monitor...
humidity??? too funny.
I'll bet that the humidity also changes the weight of your wooden sock needles - (I can hear you now, groaning.. oh no another variable to consider)

I think the entire math-of-sock-knitting concept has been extremely entertaining; so no worries, there'll not be snoozin' at this computer :-)

[Marcy]

You guys are too funny! Do you think you could get Mr. E to get a video of you stamping your widdle foot for us to see?

If you post math, I promise I will not fall into a coma.

Ask me sometime about my yarn and humidity at Webs story.

[Lynn]

Um, ah, er, I'm pretty sure you have indeed reached the feverishly delusional stage, all right.

And I like math.

[PumpkinMama]

What a pair you are! I still am in awe that you're doing this, and thank you for it because my brain goes all woozy just contemplating doing it.

[Beth S.]

I love the scientific rigor you are BOTH applying to this project. Rock on!

[Birdsong]

Wow! I won't say I am 'math challenged' as that would be inaccurate, and I have done my share of calculations... but this is so over the top, it's cool!

[Martha]

How are you going to measure the humidity? Aren't there a lot of household variables?

[Loraine alias simra on the web]

LOVE that silver needle. What a treasure.